


Frenemies (Queen) | On stop for a while

by Nerxtaylor



Category: Queen (Band)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-30
Updated: 2019-08-30
Packaged: 2020-09-30 19:54:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 10
Words: 16,380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20452667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nerxtaylor/pseuds/Nerxtaylor
Summary: Erin is coming back to London after spending an entire summer in Dublin because of some family issues. While she was away, her boyfriend Roger started a band with his best friend Brian and two another guys from college.What Erin didn't expect, was that her past was about to come again.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, so I've never written a Queen fanfic, so I think I'm getting inside of some kind of vice that will never stop. 
> 
> Anyway, if you're reading this thank you, because that means that you're brave enough to read something that this boring is writing lol. 
> 
> Also sorry, I feel this is really really boring, I'm trying my best.

I don't know what happened, my plane landed like... An hour before?-I was trying to keep my suitcase on my left hand and my phone on the other one.

-Okay, I think I can scape from here, but... You'll have to wait another hour.

I sighted, but with a smile. He was literally thinking about going away from rehearsal with his band just to take me home. How cute he was?

-Rog, you know I can take a cab, right?-I laughed at my phone thinking about my boyfriend's face.

-There's no way you're taking a cab after three months away from me.-I laughed again.-Wait for me there love, I'll be there as soon as I can, okay?

-Okay.-I whispered into the phone.-I love you.

-I love you.-I could perfectly picture his beautiful face and beautiful smile at the time he said so.

(***)

I waited for an hour, or maybe even less, at the airport waiting for Roger to pick me up.

I've spent this summer in Dublin because my father had trouble with his family and he was in a really hard depression, so I thought I could help him there. My mum, on the other hand, was completely single and happy and she needed no man after she divorced my father. She was strong and independent, and I always looked up to her.

And about me... After visiting my father I had to come again back to reality, face my second year of collage and focus on my relationship.

Roger and I met at my high school graduation. His best friend, Brian, and also my best friend I could say, was on my same class and same school, so he came to watch his graduation. Brian introduced us and we started to talk. I ended a relationship with my first boyfriend last week after the graduation and I wasn't thinking about getting into a new one, but after months and months going out together, talking and knowing each other I fell. And I mean... Who wouldn't.

While I was in Berlin he told me he started a new band, because the first one didn't end up like they (Brian and him) wanted. They haven't been together for so long, but Rog is really excited about it, and seeing him so happy makes me happy.

I saw my boyfriend's face in the distance and I got up from the chair, waiting for him to be closer a little more.

-Oh my God! It's Roger Taylor!-I screamed when I knew he could hear me.-I'm such a fan! Please, please, give me an autograph!

-I can give you every autograph you want once you stop screaming, people is looking at us.-He laughed.

-That's because they are jealous, because my boyfriend is incredibly gorgeous and so famous.

-We haven't even started the band properly talking, Erin.-He laughed again.

-But you'll be one day, I can feel it.-This time I was the one laughing. He was about to take off his sunglasses when I stopped him.-No, no, no! They look _so_ good on you.

-Okay, whatever... Can I kiss my girlfriend now please?-I laughed again and I deleted the distance between us pressing my lips against his. Six months without doing this... How could I survive? I definitely missed this a lot.-I missed you.

-I think you can definitely read my mind, because I was about to tell you the same.-I smiled and he took my suitcase before I could and giving me his hand he leaded me to his car.

-Where I should drop you?-Roger asked.

-Can I go to your flat? I don't want to go home yet.-The truth was that I did not want to see my mum yet. A lot of things happened on Dublin and I wasn't ready to tell her yet.

He looked at me waiting for some explanation but, as I said before, he can read my mind. So he just needed a look to know that I wasn't ready to talk about this yet.

The car started to make his natural sound and Roger started our way to his flat.

(***)

-Hey, hey, hey! I brought someone!-Roger screamed from the door while I looked at him.

-Who's the one who is screaming now, uh?-He picked my lips and wicked me an eye.

I followed Rog through the apartment. He was moving in when I traveled to Dublin, so this was my first time seeing it. It was very nice.

-Look who's here!-I wasn't facing him, but I could recognize that voice even being deaf.-It's my little kiddo.

I run to him with my arms open and I jumped into his neck hugging him. He was incredibly tall, or I was incredibly short, however, my feet weren't touching the floor, so he made me turn in the hair.

-Maybe I'm shorter, but I'm older than you.-I whispered into his ear.-Oh God Brian, I haven't realized how much I've missed you until now.

-So... This is more epic than our met.-We heard Roger's voice from the other part of the room.-Should I get jealous?

Brian left me in the floor kissing my forehead with a smile and he hugged me from my waist when I faced Roger sitting on the couch.

-You can love her, but you will never beat the best friend.

-I thought _we _were best friends.-I laughed as I walked to Rog and situated myself into his lap, but not facing him directly.

Brian was here, and that made that creepy, ew.

-Don't ever go again, Erin.-Brian said looking for something in the kitchen. Or what I suppose it was the kitchen.-You how it feels to deal with Roger on my own? I literally thought that you were punishing me for something.

He came back with three beers.

Yeah, that was the kitchen. I am _SO _smart.

Brian handed us two of them and we took them with a smile. If It was a normal day I would have asked for tea, but after everything that happened in Dublin, the last thing I needed was tea.

-Look, it's not my fault that I missed her.-Roger said lifting his arms up.-I mean, look at her face, she's so cute.

-Ew Roger, don't show love in front of me.-Brian covered his face with his hands while Rog let his face rest inside my neck and I was laughing.

I definitely missed this two.

-So guys, how's that band going?


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Erin talks with the boys for a while. She goes home to get her reunion with her mum. Someone from Erin's past tries to talk with her. Roger texts Erin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a lot of chapters already written, so I'll be posting them :)  
Also this one is soo boring, but I didn't have inspiration at the time.  
I hope you enjoy anyway.

-So guys, how's that band going? 

-Tim left us.-Brian said. 

-Wait, what?-I asked shocked.-Why?

-Fucking traitor.-Roger said against my neck. He left my neck free and I looked at at him with a disappointment face.-What? He is a traitor. 

-I mean, he has a point.

-Brian...-I started. That was weird. All this situation. I mean, if Tim wasn't going to play anymore with Brian and Roger, what kind of band they were about to firm?-What about the band then? 

-Don't worry about that, love.-Rog kissed my shoulder.-We have everything under control. 

-I don't like when you say that.-I said to my boyfriend raising an eyebrow. He looked at me with a sad face.-Don't look at me like that! Every time "Don't worry about that" comes out of your mouth we end up involved in drama, Roger. 

-She has also a point.-Brian laughed while I was drinking some of my beer. My phone made a sound and I looked at it. I should have done it.

-Your mum?-Roger asked stopping his little argument with our friend when he noticed I had my mind on other things. 

**Mum:** _Are you here yet? Where are you? __Tell me you're not with the blondie boy. Come home now._

-Yes.-I sighted closing my phone and getting up from my boyfriend's lap. 

-She hates me.-Roger said looking at me. I was about to say something, but she stopped me.-Don't try to say she doesn't. She does. She's always comparing me to your old boyfriend. 

-Yeah well, you shouldn't take it personally. He was an asshole at the end.-I left my beer on the lite table in front of the couch and I looked at my boyfriend with those "puppy eyes" I knew he couldn't avoid and regret.

He took out his car keys from his pocket. 

-Crash it, and I'll crash you.-I hugged Bri laughing at my boyfriend.-And get a car. 

-You love me.-I said before I kissed him.-Bye guys! And I wanna meet those band guys! 

-We love you!-Bri screamed. 

-But I do more.-Rog replied. 

-Love you both.-I said before going ot from their house and getting into Rog's car to go home. 

(***) 

When I arrived at home I parked the car in front of my house and I went inside it with my suitcase on my hand. 

-Sweetheart? Is that you? 

-Yes mum, it's me.-I said closing the door and leaving the suitcase next to the couch. 

God, I really missed this house. 

My mum appeared exiting the bathroom and run to me to hug me. I hugged back extremely confused. I mean, my mum loves me, but she never hugged me since... I was eleven, I guess. 

-Where were you?-She asked pulling back.-I was worried about you. 

-Mum, I'm twenty-one.-I laughed.-I was at Roger's. He picked me up from the airport and I wanted to see Brian and their new house before coming home to sleep. 

-Roger, uh?-Mum sighted. 

Well, Roger was kinda right. My mum didn't like him as much as he liked my ex boyfriend, but she didn't hate him. Or... Well, yes she did. 

She knew I was in love with him, and she respected that, but deeply in the heart, I was still dating my high school (and first) love. 

-You're not going to ask about dad?-I asked changing the subject. She avoided my eyes and shocked her head.-Mum, I'm not a kid and I know you're not together any longer, but c'mon! He's the father of your daughter, you have to care about that at least. 

-Well, how's him?-She asked facing me and crossing her arms over her chest. 

Since my parents got divorced she seemed to never care about dad anymore. She didn't even care about that man being my father and having family issues. She was playing the independent and strong single mum, which I sometimes admired, but sometimes I hated at the same time. 

-You know what? Nevermind.-I took my suitcase and headed to my room.-I'm tired and I have collage stuff to fix, it starts tomorrow. We can talk another day. 

I didn't mind that she was screaming my name. I just went inside my bedroom and I lied on my bed. I took my phone out again to text Roger and ask him If he had some plans for tonight. The only thing I wanted was to be alone with him for a while again and forget about my mum, about Dublin... 

Just Roger and Erin. 

A extrange message appeared on my screen and I almost threw my phone out of the window. 

**Ashley:** _Hey, are you back home yet? __Can we talk? Maybe go out and __grab a coffee like two adults. _

**Erin:** _WTF are you doing texting m__e? It's been two years without __talking to one another. _

**Ashley:** _Erin, we're friends. __It's time to make things work __again, like the old times. _

**Erin:** _Like the old times means __"before I had sex with your __boyfriend in your house while you __were at the hospital"?_

**Ashley:** _We love each other. __But he's sorry, and so am I. _

**Erin:** _Screw you, Ashley. _

I shutted down my phone after blocking her and I closed my eyes for a moment. 

Ashley Summers and Erin Smith. The inseparable and unstoppable duo. Those were my best friend and I.

I met Ashley when I was at elementary school. She was new, just moved from America. Seattle, I think. No one wanted to talk with her because of her accent. No one but me. 

We became best friends not long after, and I introduced herself to Brian. Everything in high school was still amazing, until I get a boyfriend at sophomore year. We were together for two years, but then everything went down. 

I got an accident almost at the end of senior year and I had to stay at the hospital for some weeks. My mum left our house keys to my boyfriend, so the house wasn't empty, and the day I get finally able to go home I bumped into my boyfriend and my best friend having sex on my old couch. 

Yeah, that couch ended up on the trash. Where it belonged. 

I broke up with him next day at school, and he tried to get me back, and also Ashley asked me to be friends again. But I was determined to close the page and start something new. 

Graduation came, and so did Roger.

I smiled again thinking about him. I was really in love with him. We've been together for three years and a half now, and I always thought this relationship was better than the first one. More lovely, with more confidence, less jealousy and just a little bit more mature. 

Just a little bit because Rog was a kiddo inside his soul. 

My phone made a sound again. I looked at it and I could finally confirm that my boyfriend was able to read my mind. 

**Rogie♡:** _Hey babe. Romantic dinner tonight before last year of collage starts? _

**Erin:** _Tell me the hour, please. _

**Rogie♡:** _19:30 pm at my place. Brian and I will be having a band meeting, so you can meet the guys before we go. _

**Erin:** _I'll be there! _

**Rogie♡:** _Bring my car!_

**Erin:** _You have a problem with that thing._

**Rogie♡:** _I love you baby :)_

I closed the phone again and I looked at my wrist watch. 14:45. I had plenty of time to sleep and rest from my travel before get ready and go on my date.

And of course, before meet the guys who were going to be like... My family, I guess. If they were going to spend a lot of time with my boyfriend and my best friend, they will become best friends too.

I hope so.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Erin goes to meet the band and to have her date with Roger. She gets reunited with someone she never wanted to see again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, this is the last chapter I had already written, so since now on I'll have to search for inspiration like a crazy :)
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

I fixed my outfit again looking at my own self with a ridiculous face in the mirror. I usually didn't wear dresses, but my dad bought this for me in Dublin, so I wanted to try on it. I puto some things on me to make me look more "me" and I got my purse.

-Wai- Wow!-Mum said when I was out of the bedroom.-Are you going out with the blonde boy, I guess.

-You have to stop calling him that.-I rolled my eyes playfully.-So... How do I look?

-You look beautiful.-Mum kissed my cheek.-I mean, I don't know what we're you thinking about when you agreed to date _Roger, _but he definitely knew what he was thinking about.

-Okay mum, enough insulting Rog for today.-I kissed her cheek and I started to walk to the door.-Don't wait awake.

I headed to Roger's car after saying "I love you" yo my mum and after she replied to me with the same expression. I looked in the little mirror again and I breathed before heading Roger and Brian's flat.

(***)

I rang the bell waiting for Roger or Brian to open the door, but instead of that I saw another boy, with long dark hair. He looked at me with a smile.

-Hey, I'm Erin.-I introduced myself.

-Oh, right! Roger's girlfriend, right?-I nodded.-Im Freddie, darling. Nice to meet you. I'm the singer of the band.

-Pleasure.-I smiled brighter.-Is Roger inside?

-He's changing himself, but come in honey.-When I was about to step into the house, a body stopped me. A body I knew very well.

-What the hell are you doing?-I asked Brian.

-You better wait for Rog outside.-My best friend seemed nervous. He was trying to hide something from me, and I hated that.

-Is the other boy here?-I asked trying to get inside the house, but Brian was still on my way.-Can you go away, please?

-Erin...-It was enough. He was acting weird and it was creepy, so I just pushed him away and I stepped into my boyfriend and best friend's house finally.

I could notice Brian and Freddie behind me. Brian was still calling my name, but I was too focused on the two persons that were sitting on the couch. The boy standed up and looked at me with his mouth opened.

-Erin?-The girl asked looking where her partner was looking too.

I could recognize them anywhere. It doesn't matter that I haven't had contact with them for almost two years. I knew them very well too.

-What are you doing here?-I asked looking at the boy. I felt Roger's presence at the door of the room from which he had left. He was looking at scene too.

-Erin...

-What are you doing here?-I screamed kinda sad... But mostly angry. I didn't want to see him. I didn't want to get involved with him again.

I never thought I would see him again, but here he was. John Deacon, my first love, my mother's favorite boyfriend of mine, my ex boyfriend and the guy who cheated on my with Ashley. My best friend. The girl who was also in that couch.

I should have listened to Brian.

-Baby, are you okay?-By now, Roger was next to me holding my hand and looking at me worried. Ashley and John didn't know how to react. Brian had his hands on his face and it was as he regreted something. And then was Freddie, who had no idea of what the fuck was going on.

-I wanna go.-I said to Roger. He opened his mouth to say something but I stopped him.-Please, I wanna go.

Roger was starting to understand things. He looked at Brian and Brian nodded with his head, telling Roger that his thoughts were right. He left my hand and he approached to John angrily before punch him in the face with his fist. John fell and Ashley started to scream at Roger, who was trying to get to John again, but Brian stopped him.

-You broke her, you know that?! You hurt her badly?! I'm going to kill you!

-Hey, hey, hey!-My best friend calmed Roger.-Take it easy, mate. Look at her.-Roger looked at me and I looked directly into his blue eyes.-She's not okay man, and she needs you now.

Roger came back to my side and he hugged me playing with my hair and saying "I'm sorry" against the top of my head.

-Get her out of here, Rog.-Brian said looking at us.-Have fun you both.

Roger took my hand he headed me out of the house, and then, inside his car. The first minutes of the way were completely silent, until Roger decided to talk.

-Do you wanna talk about it?-I shooked my head at Roger's question.-I didn't know it was _that _John, Erin. If I'd knew it...

-I know.-I said taking his hand while he was driving.-I know, it's just... Seeing my ex boyfriend and ex best friend there wasn't what I was expecting.

-I'm sorry for acting like that babe... When I understood everything... I don't know what happened to me.

-It's okay.-I squeezed his hand.-I just wanna have this date with you and forget about everything.-I said looking a bit at him with an smile.

(***)

My mind was better now that I was just having dinner with my boyfriend. This was what I needed after Dublin and after seeing John and Ashley again.

-So.-Roger said taking his glass.-Let's talk about Dublin.

I looked down at my plate with a nervous smile. He knew I didn't want to talk about it, he already asked me this morning when he picked me up at the airport and now, he asked again.

-Look, I know you don't wanna talk about it.-He reached for my hand across the table.-But I know you, Erin. And I know you're worried, and tense and stressed, and I hate that. I want you to be okay baby, and talk about it will help, I know that.

I sighted.

-My dad lied.-I started under his focused eyes on me.-He didn't want me to come because of family issues... Well, kinda. His wife have left him because... He is in drugs. And he want me to come to help him with his problem.-Roger was still with his hand over mine moving his thumb with love, and listening at me.-It worked for some months. Until last week. He started with that shit again and... I couldn't be there, so his wife let me stay on her house until I had to left.

-Erin...-Roger took completely my hand.-Why you didn't tell anything about this?

-Because he is my dad, Roger.-I said.-He is my responsibility.

-No, no, Erin, thats not true.-Roger said while I was trying to hide my tears.-You are his daughter, _you _are his responsibility. You didn't have to went through all of that alone love, I'm here for everything you need.

-I know.-I said smiling.-But I thought...

-You thought you could do it alone.-He completed with a chuckle. I laughed.

-Thank you, Roger. For not leaving me-I smiled.-I love you.

-You know... I can't do it know because there's a table separating us, but I'll kiss you when we are out of here.-We both laughed again. I loved his laugh, it literally brought me life.-I love you too.

-Forever?

-Forever.-He smiled lovely again.

(***)

-I'll pick you ao at seven, if you want to go to college with me and Brian.-Roger said stopping in front of my house.

-Of course.-I smiled and I picked his lips.-Thanks for tonight, love.

-Goodnight.-He kissed me again. I came out of the car waving my hand to my boyfriend with a smile. I started to walk to my door and it was when I opened it when I heard the engine of his car start and the sound of the wheels against the asphalt. I closed the door and went to the living room.

My mum was there, on the couch, sleeping with the TV switched on. I switched off the TV and I put a blanket over my mum with a smile. I kissed her cheek.

-Goodnight mum.-I smiled before heading to my room to change into my pijama. I laid down on my bed wanting to sleep, but my phone made a sound. I looked at the screen and I held my breath.

**John: ** _Can we talk? _

_«Don't replay, don't replay, don't replay»._

That was everything I could think right now. I didn't want to replay him. He didn't deserve it, and I didn't deserve it too.

Roger didn't deserve it.

But I'm stupid.

**Erin: ** _What the hell do_   
_you want from me, John? _

It was when I saw he was typing when I understood what kind of stupid thing I made. I switched off my phone and put a blanket over me. 

I didn't want John back in my life, I didn't want Ashley either. He was my boyfriend and best friend's band mate, and she was his girlfriend. That was everything. I didn't want anything more. I had Roger and I was completely in love with him, and he was completely in love with me. That's what I wanted. 

It was unfair that John was back in my life, now that I was 100% happy again. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brian, Roger and Erin go to college. Roger notices Erin keeps a secret.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like this is incredibly short, but I tried my best. Also I would appreciate any comment about what you think of this, and I love interacting with people. :) 
> 
> I hope you enjoy the chapter!

-Good morn-

I took a part of the breakfast with my mum watching me.

-Roger and Brian are here, we're going to college together.-I said cutting her. I didn't sleep thinking about John and Ashley. Mostly about John, honestly.-I overslept, we're late.

-Okay, okay.-Mum laughed.-Enjoy your first day. I love you!

-I love you too.-I caught my bag and I'll run out of my house. I saw Roger's car in front on my house and I run to it. I sat at the passenger seat,seeing that Brian was at the back.-I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

-We've been her for ten minutes Erin, we were about to leave without you.-Brian said looking at me while Rog was heading to college.

-That's not true!-Rog said and I kissed his cheek saying "thank you".-Did you overslept? You're not sleeping well? It's about Dublin? About John? Do you want me to punch him again?

-Calm down, please.-I laughed.-I just overslept because I was tired of the travel baby, relax.

-Don't punch John more.-Bri said.-I did it myself when you both went on your date.

I smiled at him from the mirror and he winked me an eye.

Brian has always been there, since we were kids. He was there in every birthday. He was there when I started to crush John. He was there when John and I started our relationship. And of course, he was there when I was heartbroken because of he cheating on me with Ashley.

And he was there when...

-Erin?-My thoughts were interrupted by Roger's voice.-Are you here or...

-Yeah, yeah, sure.-I said coming back to earth.-Just thinking about college, you know. 

I was looking at Brian in the back all the time. Trying to make him notice Roger didn't know anything about that stuff with John, and I didn't want him to know. Not because I didn't trust him, but because it was past and I didn't want to think about that anymore. 

Brian caught my look and he looked at me like saying _"You didn't tell him?"_ and I shocked my head. 

-Hey, what the hell it's going on?-Rog laughed looking at us.-What's with those faces? 

-Nothing.-I said looking at him with a reassuring smile. He looked at me wanting to say something. I knew he wasn't believing my lie. Hew knew me so well for believe that. 

-John and Ashley are coming to college this year.-Brian said changing the subject. What a fucking shitty subject to change to.-They told me they transferred. 

-Oh!-Roger said.-So you made friends with those two while we were out on a date? 

-Believe me, I would prefer to have no friends that being friends with John and Ashley again.-I smiled at Bri's words.-But I was thinking about Freddie. He was confused and it was an uncomfortable situation for him. 

-That won't be a problem when we kick John out the band.-Roger said parking the car.

-But you can't do that.-I said and both of them looked at me. I decided to talk again before Roger could speak.-I hate him, yeah. But you're not going to find a bassist as good as John Deacon. 

-You're more important that a fucking band, Erin.-Roger said taking my hand.

-And you are more important than a stupid boy that broke my heart two years ago.-I whispered.-And I want you both to take this opportunity with the best bassist you can find. And that's him. 

He looked sad and I kissed his lips with a little smile, before pulling away and saying _"I'll be okay as long as you're there"_.

Roger and Brian were looking at each other now. I was sure they were debating if believe me and let John inside the band, or get out of the car and search for him all over college and beat him up. 

I relaxed myself when I saw they were both nodding. 

-Let's go guys.-I said kissing Roger again and getting out of the car

(***) 

It was lunch time finally. 

I didn't remember how complicated and stressful college was. Although I preferred this better than Dublin's situation. 

When I got my food I looked for Roger or Brian along the cafeteria. I found Brian sitting alone in a table, so I went running for him and I sat down in front of him. 

-Don't tell him please.-I begged. 

-Are you crazy?!-He told me.-He's going to find out and the end won't be happy. He's going to kill John and maybe, he's going to break up with you. 

-It's past Brian.-I said.-I don't want to create more drama, okay? Besides, that situation is not a problem anymore. 

-Hey guys.-Our conversation was interrupted by another voice. A voice that sounded familiar. I looked at my left side and I saw Freddie standing with his tray.-Oh, I came on a bad moment? I didn't want to interrupt anything. 

-Don't worry, it's over.-I looked over at Brian. He was still mad at me, so I broke eye contact. 

-Sit down, mate.-Brian told Freddie, and the dark-haired guy sat down next to him. I forced myself to relax before Roger came.-How was first day?

-It was nice, what about you guys?-He answered with a smile. I immediately smiled back. This guy had a personality that made you feel cheer and happy instantly.

-It was cool.-Brian answered back and I nodded in agreement.

-Hello guys.-Roger said arriving and satting down next to me. He kissed me with a smile and I said hello to him laughing. 

-What are you studying, Erin?-Freddie asked friendly. 

-Journalism.-I answered with a smile. 

-My amazing girlfriend here mate, will be the queen of the journalists someday.-Rog put an arm around my shoulders making me be closer to him.

-And you will be the dentists master.-I made Brian and Freddie laugh.-We are a perfect match.

-Hey! No laughing! I'm studying biology!-Roger pointed at the other two, but they didn't stop. Roger looked at me with a serious face when I started to laugh to. I bit my lip under a smile and I caressed his cheek.-Okay, let's laugh about the short, blonde dentist! That's bullying! 

This was fun. My boyfriend, my best friend, a cool guy and me laughing about anything special.

Well, a little bit about Roger.

The fact that moments like this made me forget about John and Ashley made me happy. Until I remembered who they were and that they were inside my life again. 

-I think this is your first smile of the day. I think we are going to laugh about me more often.-Roger whispered in my ear while Brian and Freddie were in their own conversation.

-You're stupid.-I said smiling at him.-But I love you.

-Are you sure about John being in the band?-I nodded at his question.-I don't want you to feel uncomfortable.

-I'm okay, Roger.-I smiled.-I know I'll be alright. I was shocked when I saw him? Yeah, maybe because I didn't expect to see my ex boyfriend inside you house.-I laughed again.-But he's part of my past, Rog. _You _are my present.

He leaned to me and pressed his lips against mine in a gentle kiss before a voice interrupted our moment and Brian and Freddie's conversation. 

-Can I talk with you guys?

_John. _


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> John talks with the boys and Erin. Freddie and Erin talk with each other. The band becomes more serious.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel that my writing is sucking a lot oof.  
Anyway, I hope you enjoy the chapter kiddos :)

Our table was full of laugh moments ago, and we were having fun. 

That was before John came wanting to talk with Ashley behind him. 

Brian took a sit nex to me. Rog, at my other side, put his arm around me and with his other hand took one of mines. John sat next to Freddie, who went to the corner to let the couple have more space, and Ashley sat herself down next to John.

This was going to be interesting. 

Brian looked over at Roger and tried to tell him with his face _"calm down, please", _but Roger was too busy looking at John.

-Well...-Freddie broke the silence.-I think I better be off.

-No, stay.-Ashley said.-He wants all of you to hear this.

-Just say what the hell you want so we can go back to class.-I squeezed Roger's hand calming him down. I looked at John with a serious face and he took a deep breath.

-I just wanted to say I really want to be in that band, but I'll understand if you don't want me there knowing the mistake I made while I was dating Erin.-He said and I rolled my eyes.

-Mistake?-Brian asked with a rough laugh.-You know how she was the days after we bumped on you two having sex on her fucking couch? I've never seen someone that broken.

-I can imagine, Brian.-John said.-I regret everyday the way things went out. I wish I could go back and make things end up better.-John looked at Roger.-She's literally gold, Roger. I'm glad you were there for her and made her believe in love again. And hurt her or take her away from you isn't my objective at all. I've never seen her so happy with someone, nor even with me.

I looked at Roger wanting him to be nice. Yeah, John was a piece of trash, but he was trying, so it was correct for Roger to try it too. 

-As long as you don't hurt her again we should be fine.-John smiled at Roger's words.-Erase that smile, we are not going to be friends. You are here because you are good with the bass, and because my girlfriend wants to.

John looked at me with a smile and he said _thank you. _I nodded just one time with my head, and then I noticed Bri's eyes ON Ashley. 

-What about her?-He asked.-I'm sure Erin and Roger won't feel comfortable with a traitor around.-Ashley rolled her eyes.-Neither will I. 

-I wanna live this opportunity for my boyfriend with him.-She said with a serious face.-I won't disturb her, I'll even sit on her opposite corner if you want. But I wanna be there for John, like she's gonna be there for Roger.

-You're trying to compare both situations? Are you joking?-Roger asked and Ashley rolled her eyes again.-That's the only thing you can do? 

-Roger.-I whispered. He looked at me and I caressed his face with a smile. He sighted and I looked at Brian. He nodded with his head leaving me the freedom to make the decision.-Fine, she will be there. 

The bell rang and every student started heading themselves to class. We got up and I kissed Roger's cheek. 

-I'll meet you at the parking lot, yeah?-He asked and I nodded.-I love you. 

-I love you too.-I said while he was taking my hand insisting on walk with me to my class. We said goodbye to Brian and Freddie and we started our walk together.-You have to calm yourself down a bit more around John, please. If you want this to work. 

-I wanna work on crashing him with my car.-Roger said leaving my hand and putting his arm around my shoulders bringing me closer. I laughed at his comment.-The only thing that it's keeping me apart from doing it is that you are a terrible amazing person with the boy that broke your heart. 

-If he never broke my heart we wouldn't be together now.-I hugged him by the waist still walking.-I wish It had been different, but I have you, and that's what matters the most.

Roger smiled at me and kissed the side of my head in a lovely way. 

-This is my class.-I said stopping at the hall.-See you later, love. 

I got into my class after saying goodbye to my boyfriend, and although I tried to stay focused on the class I couldn't. I was picturing all the bad situations we could live if things between Roger and John were not going to be the best. Roger was pretty excited about this band, and I didn't want this to go bad. He deserved this. 

-Miss Smith?-I came back to reality when my teacher called my name.-Could you please leave the clouds alone and stay with us in class?

-I'm sorry Miss Howard. Yesterday I arrived from Dublin pretty latr and I didn't have time to rest.-I lied.-Im trying to stay focused. 

-Well, keep trying.-She said before returning her attention to the blackboard. 

(***) 

**Rogie♡: ** _Wait at the parking lot, I'm waiting for Bri. Freddie's coming too. I love you. _

I was starting to be worried. Not either Roger, Brian or Freddie had shown up in the five minutes I've been waiting near Roger's car. I kinda laughed at myself after that. I mean, what kind of danger would they be in school? It made no sense. 

-Hey.-I looked at my right side and I smiled instantly when I saw Freddie there. I waved him a hand.-I guess it's the two of us for now. 

-Roger is still in the building waiting for Brian. Sometimes is really hard to deal with them.-I sighted laughing. 

-How long have you been knowing them?-Freddie asked. 

-Brian and I have been best friends since we were three.-I smiled.-And Brian introduced Roger and I to each other at our Senior year graduation. 

-I've met them at a concert this summer.-He explained.-Roger was all the time talking about you, darling. He must be really in love with you. 

-He is.-I smiled picturing Roger's smile in my mind.-And I'm really in love with him too. He made me happy when I was at my worst. 

Roger was like a guardian angel that came to my life when I needed him the most. When I broke up with John because he cheated on me I thought I wouldn't be able to trust someone like him again. But then he came, and he was charming, and cared about me. He made me fall in love again after I had a really hard heartbreak. 

-By the way, sorry about yesterday.-I apologized.-I know it was pretty uncomfortable and confusing for you. It wasn't the way I wanted to meet you either. 

-It's okay darling, don't worry about me.-He smiled again.-I think you're really brave, y'know? Dealing with your ex boyfriend and ex best friend, I mean. 

-When I was in Dublin the only thing he talked about was how cool could be starting a band. He wants this, and I want to be there for him.-I smiled.-And if I have to deal with them, so it be. 

-I'm surprised you didn't throw John out of the window yesterday, he totally deserved it.-He laughed.-Also Ashley. 

-Don't worry, I'll find another best friend to talk about boys, clothes, make up and those things.

-I can be that! 

-The spot is yours, I guess.-I smiled and he hugged me by the shoulders. I was really comfortable, until someone tear us apart pushing Freddie away. 

-Leave my girl alone, thank you.-Roger hugged me kissing the top of my head. I laughed looking at Freddie and he hit Rog in the forehead. I smiled at Roger and I kissed him with a smile. 

-Okay kiddos, let's get out of here.-Brisn said sitting in the back with Freddie, while I sat down at the passenger seat and Roger, of course, at the driver's seat. 

-The space guy wanting to go home?-I asked looking at my best friend.-Who are you? We want out Brian back. 

-Have I ever told you how annoying you are?-He asked me with a sarcastic smile and I laughed grabbing my phone and texting my mum I wasn't going to get home any soon. 

-What were you doing that made you both get late, uh?-Freddie asked.-My friend Erin and I were about to die there waiting for you. 

-I had free hour, so I started to write and I forgot about the time until Roger knocked the class door.-Brian explained and I looked at him for a moment through the mirror.-Writing a song. 

-This is serious, uh?-Roger smiled drivimg a looking at my phone. I nodded at the front telling him _keep your eyes there or were going to crash_.-We will be ready when I crash John with my car. 

**Erin: ** _I'm going to Roger and Brian's place. Don't wait for me for dinner, or sleep. Loveya._

_-_We have talked about it at lunch and you're _NOT_ going to crash John with the car.-I told him.-What if you hurt your poor car, uh? 

-If I crash him it will be worth it.-My boyfriend said.-But you're incredibly good with him and his traitor girlfriend, so I'm going to stay quiet.

-That's my boy.-I smiled at him before looking at my phone after it made a sound. 

**Mom: ** _DON'T YOU DARE TO SLEEP WITH THE BLONDIE BOY IN THE SAME BED ERIN SMITH. Love you too hun. _

-And Freddie.-I called my friend's name. I smiled at my thought. This guy was incredibly funny and good with me, and it made every situation less serious and more happy.-I have to hear you sing when we get home. 

-OF COURSE DARLING.-He said with a smile.-It will be a pleasure to show you my talent. 

-I'm going to call you_ "ego boy" _since now on.-Brism said rolling his eyes looking at the dark-haired boy. 

I laughed and I looked at Roger's profile. He was focused on the highway and I bit my lip hiding a smile. 

Oh my God, I was a fool in love with this boy. 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Erin reveals her secret to Roger. John talks with Erin and makes a confession about Ashley.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Late chapter, I know,vut school has me really busy, so I'm trying to be as active as possible and bringing you long chapters :)
> 
> I hope you enjoy this one <3

We've been chilling in Brian and Roger's house for an hour. I did some school notes that I didn't take in class because I wasn't focused when I had to be, Freddie showed me how _amazingly _he sings and Brian and Roger were arguing (as always) because Brian wanted to go to his room and read while Roger wanted the four of us to stay in the living room. 

-So we let Erin do her notes that _she should have already done _in class, but I can't go to my room and forget about your annoying existence for a while?-Brian asked pointing at me and looking at Roger. 

-Keep pointing at me with that finger and I'll cut it.-I smiled sarcastically at my best friend. 

I've finished my notes some minutes ago, so now I was just sitting in Roger's lap, so Freddie and Brian could sit on the couch too, sharing a beer with him. 

-C'mon! You read all the time!-Roger said with his hands around my hips.-And just an advice... If you want to read you should do it tonight.-My boyfriend looked at me.-Because my baby and I are going to be really, really busy. 

-Like how?-Freddie asked and I contained a laugh. 

-Like in a sexual way, of course.-I hit Roger with my elbow while Brian pretended to throw up and Freddie made a disgusting face. 

-First of all, I hope you don't cook because I was planning to stay to dinner. Second of all, I hope Brian's room isn't really close to yours. Third of all, Roger, that's disgusting!-Freddie said exaggerating and making me laugh while I took a sip of my beer.-And fourth, get a condom. I don't want a pregnancy yet. 

My eyes found Brian's. 

_Pregnancy..._

I literally spit the beer into him. 

-Oh my God! Oh my God!-I got up from Roger's lap and I stood up in front of Brian in the couch.-I'm so sorry Bri, oh my god! I'm so stupid... 

His entire shirt was wet because of the beer and I'm sure other fluids of my mouth. 

-It's okay, it's okay, it's just a drink Erin.-He said kissing my forehead. He stood up and caressed the top of my head.-I'm gonna get changed, I'll be right back. 

I watched him getting lost into the hall and I but my lip. Oh god, I was so stupid... I sat in Roger's lap again and I hide my face into the crock of his neck. He stroked my back and kissed the top of my head lovingly. 

-It's okay love, it's just beer. We don't have to make a drama of it.-Roger said.-But... What do you have against the word _"pregnancy". _

Oh god... 

-Nothing.-I said facing him again.-Just... You know, Freddie surprised me, I didn't expect that. 

-Can you leave us alone for a bit Fred, please?-Roger asked. I closed my eyes sighting. I knew he didn't believe me. He knew me too well, of course he didn't believe me. Freddie nodded with his head and gave us a smile before bumping into Brian in the hall and they both went together inside Brian's room.-Look Erin, these two days... You've been really weird. You are not you. I know it must have been really hard your situation at Dublin, and then face your ex boyfriend and best friend again... But I know there's something more, and it's killing me that you don't want to tell me, because I love you and I wanna help you. 

I couldn't d feel more guilty. 

-Since when you know I'm hiding something?-I asked while he began to stroke my hair. 

-My suspicions started when you saw John for the first time and this morning in the car when you exchange weird looks with Bri.-He smiled.-You know you can trust me. 

-I don't want you to break up with me Rog.-I said and he looked at me scared.-We were and we are so well... It isn't fair that John showed up again and it's bringing all my past with him. 

-Who told you I'm gonna break up with you?-I looked into his beautiful blue eyes and I immediately relaxed. I knew I could trust him, and I knew he deserved the truth if he was going to be with me for a long time and if he was going to work with John. 

Here we go. 

-I haven't been totally honest with you about John and I.-I started.-Yes, we were together. Yes, he cheated on me with Ashley while I was at the hospital, but... Something else happened at the hospital. 

He was listening with all his attention. 

-I was unconscious for five or six weeks. When I woke up my mum was sleeping at the chair beside me and Brian was sleeping with his head on the side of my bed. I woke him up because I figured out that my mum had been there without sleeping all those weeks.-I explained remembering the scene.-Brian woke up and he immediately hugged me, but I knew he was weird, like you knew I was acting weird too. 

-I guess we have super powers.-He laughed rubbing his thumb along my cheek.

-I asked him what was happening and he told me that the doctors had found something on my scanners. Something... Important.-I closed my eyes for a moment, still feeling my boyfriend's thumb caressing my cheek.-They found out that I was pregnant. 

Roger eyes were entirely opened now. His touch never stopped though. I sighted remembering the moment. 

-John went inside the room in that moment and I didn't know what to do so... I didn't tell him. I wanted to wait until I wa sout of the hospital, so we both could figure out how we were about to get through that. But... Well, I bumped into John and Ashley on my couch. 

-Erin...-Roger said. 

-I didn't tell him before that. I didn't tell my mum either. I was afraid about what would she think of me.-I sighted again.-I was a seventeen year-old girl, pregnant and alone. Just Brian was there for me, but I felt alone all the time. 

-What happened with the baby?-Roger asked.-I never saw you with a pregnant belly or something. 

-I had an unexpected abortion a few days before the senior graduation.-I explained and he nodded.-That's why I didn't tell you. Because it's something from my past that will never get me again, and I didn't want you to think different of me or som-

-Listen at me.-He put his fingers under my chin and made me look at him.-I'm in love with you, Erin. I've always been in love with you, since Brian introduced us to each other. You're the most beautiful, smart, strong and cute girl I've ever met, and the most supportive one.-I laughed a little.-And I want to be with you. I want to be with you more than I want this band to succeed. You're the most important thing I have and I always want to have. 

I took his face into my hands and I looked at him with a smile. 

-I love you.-He said ending his speech.-Forever. 

-I love you too.-I said eliminating the distance between our lips. This conversation made me had a height out of my shoulders that I didn't even know I had. This guy was the best thing that ever happened to me too, and I was about to do anything to keep him in my life. 

(***) 

I woke up with an arm around my waist. I opened my eyes and I saw my boyfriend looking at me and stroking my hair with a smile. I yawned while he put me closer. 

-This is a great way to wake up.-He said and I smiled. 

-Yeah, it is.-I smiled back I pressed my lips against his, although I pushed back immediately.-You taste horrible in the morning, Roger. 

-You too, deal with it.-Roger used the arm he had around my waist to push me closer to him and he kissed me again. I smiled in the middle of the kiss.

After our conversation we made our way to Roger's room after saying to Brian and Freddie that we were about to go to sleep. I didn't want to sleep with my tight clothes, so Roger gave me one of his shirts and that made me be comfortable and free all night. 

That shirt had his scent, so now I had Roger's nice scent all over my body. 

We kept kissing each other for some minutes, until I remembered I was the responsable half of the couple and I stood up.-No! Why? Come here. 

-Roger, we have class.-I said looking for some clothes from my suitcase that I left here the say I arrived from Dublin. I change myself while my boyfriend was still in bed looking at me.-What?

-Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?-He asked putting his hands on the back of his neck. I lent down on the bed and I pecked his lips. 

-Get change and go to have breakfast please.-I smiled before leaving the bedroom and going down the hall. I had to cross the living room so I could arrive to the kitchen, and I had to do it with silence because Freddie was sleeping on the couch. When I arrived at the kitchen Brian was already there, making some coffee and stuff for breakfast.-Can I help?

-Morning.-He said looking at me with a smile. I kissed his cheek and I started to make my own coffee.

-I told Roger.-I just said smiling. 

-About... About the baby?-Brian asked shocked. I nodded still with a smile on my face.-What did he said? 

-That he was in love with me, and that I was strong and... Just stuff like that.-My best friend smiled giving me a hug.-I'm so relieved now... I should have done this before. 

-Yes, you should.-He gave me the _"I told you" _look.-But I understand your point, and I think it was valid. But my point was also valid. 

-Morning guys.-Roger said arriving at the kitchen with a smile. He kissed my cheek lovely.-Can I help? 

-Yeah, waking up Freddie, or we will get late.-Brian said while I was starting to make some bacon. 

Roger made his way to the couch and started to hit Freddie with a pillow the sleeping boy had on his feet. I started to laugh watching the scene. 

-I said woke up Freddie, not kill Freddie.-Brisn said laughing too. 

-Fuck you blonde boy.-Freddie said from the couch.-This is how sleepovers are for you? Let me tell you they suck. 

-Wake up little diva, we have class.-Roger said making his way to the kitchen again. He put his hands on my waist even I was giving him my back. He kissed my neck while I was still making bacon. I closed my eyes for a moment laughing. 

-If you don't stop I'm gonna give up and burn your house with us inside.-I said biting my bottom lip. 

-It would be a pleasure dying next to you.-Roger said into my ear. I laughed lovely and I finished the breakfast, so I faced him. 

-Don't you prefer wake up next to me?-I asked and he smiles pulling me into a kiss. I pulled back and left the kitchen going to find Freddie sitting in the couch.-Hi.

-Hey bestie.-He said putting his arm around my shoulders when I sat down next to him. We heard Brian complaining about the _"bestie" _term and we both laughed about it.-So... I don't want you think that I was listening your conversation with Roger yesterday... But I was.-I simply laughed. 

-It's okay, I was going to tell you anyway.-I smiled and I rested my head on his shoulder.-You can't tell John. 

-Why would I? You're my friend, and the only person who has the right to tell him about that is you, Erin. 

-Thanks.-I whispered and he kissed the top of my head. 

-Leave my breakfast alone, you blonde bitch!

-Only my mother-in-law is able to call me that! 

That were my boys. Fighting. Again.

-Let's go?-I asked Freddie nodded into the kitchen's direction. 

-Sure, before they kill each other. I really need this band with my guitarrist and my drummer kids.-He replied with a joking smile. 

(***) 

I couldn't be really focused on classes today either.

After having breakfast with the boys at Brian and Roger's place we came to college together in Roger's car. I promised to myself that I would be perfectly focused on my lessons today, but it was impossible. Every time I tried to think about my classes the fact that I was sharing college with John and Ashley came to my mind. 

Thank God it was lunch time already. 

-Hey Erin.-I looked up and I saw the boy that was currently on my mind, but not in a good way.-Can I... Uh... Can I talk with you for a moment? 

I looked at both sides of the cafeteria. 

-You know that if my boyfriend was here he could be committing a murder, right?-I asked at John looking at him. He sat down in front of me.-What do you want, John? 

-I just wanted to thank you for convincing Brian and Roger to let me be in the band...-He barely smiled at me showing me a little part of his teeth.-You know how much music means to me and... 

-Hold on.-I stopped him.-Do you think I did it for you?-I laughed sarcastically.-Get that idea out of your mind, John. I did it because I've spent the worst summer ever in Dublin and the only thing that formed a smile on my face was hearing my boyfriend talking about his illusion for this band. You're a good bassist, and that's what his band's deserves. I did it for Roger, not for you. 

-Oh... Uh... I see...-John talked looking into my eyes.-I thought... That deep in your heart you... You know... You still cared about me. 

-You thought wrong.-I smiled a little bit letting out a sight.-I'm sorry if you thought that, but it's been two years without thinking about you in that way, John. 

-I understand.-He nodded once. It was strange hearing his accent again. It was a very particular accent that I only heard on him, so when I lost contact with him I forgot about that accent. And now here it was. The fucking accent, and the fucking John Deacon.-You have Roger, and you're happy and I like seeing you happy after all.

-And you have Ashley.-I remembered him while he was standing up. 

-I do.-He smiled one more time.-But I don't let her call me Deaky. 

I have him the last look before he went to a table where Ashley was already waiting for him. 


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The guys go for a band rehearsal and Erin and Ashley have a fight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry for being so inactive but I'm on senior year and I have a lot of exams :(  
I hope you like this shitty chapter at least :')
> 
> See you soon <3

I laughed at my phone again. 

-Just go, okay?-I told Roger.-Ill take the bus, I just need a paper for a project I have to do.

-You shouldn't take the bus if I can drive you babe.-He said. I heard Freddie's voice at the back telling him tu shut up and start to drive, and Brian's voice complaining to Freddie because it's disrespectful screaming when someone is phoning.

-Roger love, get your ass to that house and have that band rehearsal!-He sighted again and I could picture his eyes being rolled.-Show 'em what my boyfriend has.

Silence. 

-For me?-I asked in a cheesy tone. And that was the thing that made him broke and agree with me.-See you later, have fun at rehearsal. 

-I love you.-He said.

-I won't let him kill anyone!-I heard Freddie.-If you know what I mean. 

-Get your fucking ass on the seat.-Roger said and I laughed.-I see you later. 

-I love you.-I said before ending the conversation. I walked to the college's elevator and I found someone there waiting to. I smiled and I said hi when I arrived next to her. It was a girl. 

-Wow, you're talking to me.-She said and I closed my eyes.-That's new. 

-Ashley...-I sighted.-I thought you would be at Roger's house with John. 

-I have to talk with a teacher, so I can't go today.-She replied looking at me. The elevator arrived and I walked in ignoring her the most I could.-I could say the same about you. 

-I need a paper.-I answered in a simple way.-I'll take the bus then. 

-Great.-Ashley smiled.-Wish John luck for me. 

-Send him a text.-I didn't look at her. It was uncomfortable and painful looking at her. I wanted to get away from there, get the fucking paper and going to my boyfriend's arms.

But then it happened. 

The lights went off, all that you could hear was silence and the elevator stopped.

GREAT! 

Ashley pressed the button which had to open the doors but nothing happened. 

-Shit.-She said.-I think some thing's wrong with the electricity... We're trapped here. 

-You and I, are trapped here, together?-I said sitting on the floor. She hummed and and I kicked the elevator's doors letting a "fuck" coming out of my mouth.

-Relax, I pressed the emergency button.-Ashley said sitting next to me.

There was an awkward silence for a while. Some minutes I would say. Our phones weren't working for phone calls on the elevator, so we couldn't call anyone for help. I tried to avoid her while she was playing some game on her phone. I was just looking at pictures on mine. More specifically, pictures of me and Roger through the years. I was smiling like a stupid looking at one. I remembered that pic and that moment. He was sitting on his old bed, at his mum's house, and I was resting my head on his legs. We just pushed away from a kiss, and I was with my eyes closed and a smile on my face, while Rog was with his blue eyes opened, looking at me with a lovely smile, our noses were touching each other. 

-You both seem really happy.-Ashley said. I looked at her and I noticed she was looking at my phone screen. 

-Yes, we are.-I said looking down at my phone again. I smiled again seeing that picture.-We really love each other. 

-That's good Erin.-Ashley said.-I'm glad you finally found someone right for you. 

She had to ruin the conversation. 

-I actually did.-I said angry again.-A while ago. But you put your nails over him like the selfish and jealous bitch you are and I never noticed you were before seeing you having sex with my boyfriend on my couch.-Ashley turned her face to her phone again, a tear going down her cheek.

Maybe it sounds horrible, but I didn't feel guilty. She hurt me, she betrayed me, and that's something I will never be able to forget. I deserved hurting her, I deserved some self relieved. 

-What I did was terrible.-She sad after some other minutes of silence.-And I regret everything. 

-Of course, I can see. You're still with John.-I replied. 

-I don't regret being with John... I regret... How things went.-She said.-We should have talked to you. He should have broken up with you and I should have been honest with you about my feelings for John since the moment I understood I liked him.

-Kinda late to regret it, don't you think?-I rolled my eyes shutting my phone. I tried to focus on find a way to scape from here or make someone hear us, but the only thing u could hear was a little sob.-Ashley, are you crying? 

I looked over my ex-best friend. She was covering her eyes with her hands and her dark hair. I could hear her crying even she tried to don't make it too obvious. I didn't know what to say now. Maybe I went too far. 

-I'm sorry.-She apologized letting me see her wet and red eyes through her brown color.-I'm sorry about what I did to you. I'm sorry I've been the worst best friend ever. I'm sorry I broke your heart and I'm sorry I betrayed you, Erin... You're my best friend and... 

-You have no right to make me feel guilty.-She looked at me surprised when she saw I was starting to cry too.-I had an accident, I was at the hospital unconscious. And while nobody knew if I was going to die, you were having sex with my boyfriend, Ashley. How can you say sorry for something like that? 

-I... 

-I shouldn't be feeling guilty, I should stay mad at you and I should say all the bad things you did as a best friend.-I finish y speech when the lights were switched on again and the elevator doors opened. We could see Roger, Brian, Freddie and John standing outside. I run to hug Roger while John got into the elevator to hug Ashley. Roger hugged me caressing my back. 

-We thought that...-Brian tried to say something, but the scene him surprised and couldn't say anything. 

-We thought that something happened to you.-Freddie ended.-You were 2 hours late and... 

-Are you okay.-Roger put my hand between his hands and looked at my eyes. I nodded trying to make the tears stop and I hugged him by the waist again.-You want me to get you home? 

I looked at Ashley again. She was already standing up hugging John too, but she started crying again when she looked at me. 

-Yes.-That was the only thing I replied to my boyfriend. 

(***) 

My mum wasn't at home, that meant that Roger could stay a little bit with me. He was hugging me and playing with my hair while we cuddled on my couch. 

-Do you wanna talk about it, uh?-He asked kissing my temple. I just shocked my head.-Baby...

-Just hug me.-I said adjusting myself closer to my boyfriend.-Roger.

-Tell me.-He whispered at me kissing the top of my head. I changed my position and I situated myself on his lap, my legs at both sides of his legs. He caressed my low back under the hem of my T-shirt. I put my arms around his neck. 

-Do you think I'm a bad person?-He seemed shocked about my question and he looked me directly into the eyes. I caressed the hair on the back of his neck. 

-Why the hell would I think that?-Roger seemed shocked.-You're the best person I've ever met. 

-I told Ashley a lot of bad things when I was the elevator with her...

-Stop right there.-He told me putting a finger on my lips.-You are the nicest person I've ever met Erin. Ashley was a shit with you and she deserves everything you say to her. 

We got silenced for a moment. He was still caressing my back and giving sweet kisses on the top of my head. 

-I love you baby.-He said whispering. 

-I love you blonde boy.-I joked with the nickname my mother gave him. I looked up and kissed him on the lips. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Erin fights with her mum and spends the night with Roger. She finally gets to see a ban rehearsal and has a comfortable moment with John.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is the longest chapter for now, I'm really proud of it :)  
There's a lot of cute and badass moments (Spoiler: My favorite one is the end hehe)  
I hope you enjoy it <3

Roger and I stayed at my sofa cuddling and watching TV. We didn't talk about Ashley anymore. In fact, we were absolutely in silence. I kissing his cheek and he was always playing with my hair and kissing the top of my hair. 

-Sweetie, are you home?-Roger got tense when he heard the door and my mum's voice. I kissed his cheek again and I shouted my mum. She appeared in the living room and her eyes were directly pointing at Roger.-Oh, you didn't tell me the blond boy was... Here. 

-Something happened.-I answered.-I had a breakdown, he wanted to stay with me.-I've made a pause.-And his name is Roger, mum. 

-Is he going to stay to dinner?-Mum asked with a sight. 

-Yes.

-No.-Roger said at the same time I said he was going to. I looked at him and he gave me a kiss on the cheek before looking at his watch.-I should actually get going.

-No, wait, stay a little bit.-I got up from the cocuh and walked towards him. He hugged me and started to whisper thing in my ear. 

-Keep the window open by ten.-We pulled away and he kissed winking me an eye.-I love you. 

-I love you too.-I said sad because he was going. After the door was closed I looked at my mum.-What's your problem? 

-I just asked if he was going to stay Erin, don't make such a drama for this.-He rolled her eyes going to her room and change herself. 

-I'm tired mum.-I followed her.-Roger is not John, okay? John wasn't perfect mum! I was dying and he was fucking Ashley in our house! Do you really want me to be with a person like that? Roger cares about me. He's always there for me when I need him, he loves me, he puts myself over himself and he makes me feel loved. How can you not like that?! He's the nicest guy ever and you _NEVER_ said a nice word to him! You never called him by his name, and I'm tired mum. 

-He's going to break your heart.-She said not even looking at me. 

-But it's fine if John breaks my heart?-I asked with a sarcastic laugh. 

-I'm sure he didn't want to, you would be fine now if you were mature to give him a second chance.

-I can't believe this...-I said under my breath.-I came from Dublin and you didn't even ask how dad was. You never were nice to my boyfriend. You don't even want to say Bri anymore because he didn't defend John, for God's sake! 

-Brian was also immature Erin.-She changed herself into a pajama and sat at her bedroom.-I'll be making dinner in a while. 

-I don't want to have dinner... I don't want to live with a mother that doesn't supports me when I'm in love with someone.-I said looking at her crying and going out of her room. 

-What are you going to do?-She asked laughing.-Live with the blonde boy? 

-Maybe...-I arrived at the door and look at her with an angry face and tears in my eyes.-And his name is Roger! 

I shouted the door and went to my room. 

(***) 

As Rog told me I left my window open. He came into my room around 10:00 pm through the window and he run to my bed when he saw me crying. I didn't stop crying since my mum and I fought. She made dinner and she didn't call me for it, I just stayed in my room studying and waiting for my boyfriend. Roger hugged me and didn't stop whisper in my ear "everything is going to be alright". It wasn't going to be alright. I stopped seeing my mum as the hero she always was to me, to see her as a selfish person that didn't care about what I thought it was the best for my own self. That was the saddest thing ever. 

Roger laid on my bed and I cuddled him letting my head rest on his chest and relaxing myself by hearing his calm heartbeat. 

-I kinda told her I was going to live with you and get the hell out of here...-I sighted.-God, I'm such a dumbass... 

-Hey...-Roger kissed my temple.-Don't say that... You were angry and you're tired of this situation. I'm sure we can work on something. 

-Roger, you just have moved with Brian.-I said.-You can't move with me and let him alone because... 

-Brian will be mad?-Roger asked laughing.-Erin, Brian is our number one shipper. I think he will get me out of our flat if we tell him we want to live together. 

-Would you live with me?-I asked looking over at him. He kissed my nose. 

-I would do anything for you, Erin.-He smiled.-Freddie was living with his girlfriend, but she cheated and go away from their house. Freddie can't afford the flat by his own. We could buy it so he can move with Brian. 

-Do you think he will accept?-I asked. 

-Of course. First of all because he needs to.-We laughed.-And second... I think he really likes you and he's really sympathetic with your situation because his situation is kinda similar. 

-He's a great boy.-I smiled remembering how nice Freddie was to me when we met and the day after.-I think we are going to be really good friends. 

-I hope so, because he's going to be a very regular part of my life since now on.-Roger answered.-And you are part of that life too. Also Brian.

-And John...-I said smiling and he let it go a tired sight.-How was rehearsal? 

-I hate to admit it... But he's so fucking incredible.-I laughed.-I mean, he controls the bass pretty well, and his riffs are good... 

-He's really great.-I smiled.-He's shy but talented. And a son of a bitch. 

-A fucking talented son of a bitch.-Roger laughed.-He's not so fucking horrible when he's silent and playing. 

I laughed and we stayed in silence for a while. I was still relaxing myself with his heartbeat. He was kissing the top of my head in a regular way and he started making circles with his fingers at my lower back under my T-shirt.

-Can you stay with me tonight?-I asked.-I don't think my mum will get into my room for a while... 

-I was planning to before you asked.-He smiled showing his teeth. He kissed the top of my head again and whisper into my ear.-Get some sleep baby, there's no class tomorrow, but it will be a long day. 

That words and his fingers drowing imaginary circles on my back was the perfect things to make me fall into a beautiful sleep. 

(***) 

-Living together?-Brian asked with his eyes open. I nodded with a wide smile on my face while Roger was putting his arm around my shoulders.-God guys, I've been waiting a lot for this, congratulations! 

-Oh god, it's not like we are getting married.-Rog laughed kissing my cheek and then whispered a yet in my ear. 

-Just saying. I want to the bridesmaid.-Freddie said coming to the living room from the kitchen and caressing my cheek. 

-You surely will be.-I laughed at my friend and accepted the beer he was handing to me. 

-Actually Fred...-Roger said looking at Freddie.-We wanted to ask you about your apartment. If you still need someone to buy it. You could live here with Brian. 

-OH GOD YES!-Freddie screamed getting up from the couch. He looked at us containing our laughs and sat down again.-I mean, if you don't mind Brian, of course. 

-It will be a pleasure to be your rommie.-Brian answered to Freddie. The door bell rang in that moment and I went to the door. I breathed, knowing who I was going to be facing. I opened the door and I saw John standing in front of me with his bass and I smiled looking at the instrument. 

-You won't never change it, right?-I asked stepping aside so I could let him in. 

-This little thing is the only thing that has always been in my life since my childhood. I won't never change it.-He laughed coming into the living room.-Heh guys. 

-Hey kid.-Freddie said with a smile. 

-Ashley?-I asked at my ex-boyfriend. 

-It's her sister's wedding, she's not coming today.-He explained a d I nodded. 

-I didn't know Alexa was getting married.-I said surprised.-Wasn't she the one who said it was a stupid thing to give a whole life to another person? 

-She hated commitment.-Brian pointed laughing and John and I followed him. I looked at John and I gave him an honest smile. 

-Okay guys.-I said.-I didn't hear you all together yet, let's see how's my favorite band going.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Erin's dad calls her, but it's not the only call Erin receives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lmao, it's been so long.  
Whatever, just enjoy :)

It was unbelievable how good John sounded with the guys, but here they were, playing in front of me and killing it. The sound was amazing, but I thought there was something missing.

-So?-Freddie asked when they ended.-What do you think?

-It was amazing! You guys are amazing!-I said while Roger came from his drums in the back and came next to me hugging me by my back.-There's just... One thing. 

-Tell us, we're all ears.-Brian said placing his guitar away for a moment. 

-You're just too focused on playing and sounding good by yourselves, and that's good, you have to sound amazing by yourselves so when the band comes together you sound even better.-I explained.-But I think... You're not really a band. I mean you're just looking at your instruments too focused on sounding good. You guys have to interact with each other, you know? Look at each other, move across the stage, don't be so far away from each other... 

-I agree with her.-John said placing his bass aside. 

-Of course you are.-Roger said rolling his eyes. 

-Roger...-Brian added in advertisement. 

-She is right and smart, Roger. Even a little kid would agree with her.-John said again.-We are here and we don't notice thlse things. But she's there, and she does, and the crowd will too. 

-Did you just call me... Smart?-I laughed.-I thought I was the dork one out of us. 

-Well, I had and still have some self-pride lady, let me be.-He laughed and I looked at Roger. 

-Do you have self-pride too, love?-I asked and he kissed my lips with a playful smile.-I'll take that as in _"You're totally right Erin, you're a genius" _

-Okay my darlings, let's take five.-Freddie said going to kitchen with Brian, leaving John, Roger and I at the living room. Roger put his arms around my waist.

-You're up for a date tonight?-He asked smiling while I put my arms around his neck. 

-You know I'm always up for a date with you.-I said and he started to kiss me. I was smiling between kisses while I was listening the other guys talking.-Do you think I can stay here tonight? I really don't want to go to my house. 

-If course babe, you don't have to ask that.-He kissed my forehead and hugged me resting his chin on the top of my head stroking my hair with one hand and caressing my back with the other.-I promise everything will get fixed once we live together.

I smiled at his comment and sighted against his chest. This was everything I needed. 

-Hey you two.-Freddie said stopping our moment. We both looked at him but we didn't push each other away.-You know I love you together, but we have to sort this out. So Roger, if you like... 

-Go.-I kissed him and started to go to the door.

-I'll be in your house at seven.-My boyfriend said. I looked at him and smiled back to him while I crossed the door.

Facing my mum again was going to be interesting. 

I was having a normal way back home, just walking and chilling thinking about the date that I was going to have tonight with my boyfriend. However, a song pulled me out of my thoughts. It was my phone. I looked at the screen before accepting the call. 

_"Dad" _

I sighted for a moment before approaching the phone to my ear without stopping my walk. 

-Hey dad.-I greated him with a smile. 

-Hello baby girl.-He sounded more healthy and happy, and that made me happy too.-Are you too busy right now? 

-No, I just got home.-I went inside my home and made a sign to my mum telling her I was on the phone so I didn't want an argument. I went to my room and sat down on my bed.-Why? Did you have a special motivation to call me? 

-Actually yes.-He answered. I could picture his smile.-I was really disappointed at myself when I let you down the las week you were here. So I talked to Helen and we both agreed I needed help. I'm getting into a rehabilitation center next week. 

-Dad! That's amazing!-I smiled at my phone.-I'm really proud of you. I'm sure you know this is the best thing to do. I just want you to be okay. 

-I know baby girl, and I will. I promise you I'll work hard on it.-I smiled at my phone again.-So, tell me about this boy you're dating. We didn't get to talk about him enough while you were here. 

-About Roger?-I heard my father hummed.-He's... He's really amazing dad. He's always there for me, and he's caring and supportive. He treats me really well and loves me so much. 

-That's good baby, I'm happy for you. 

-I wish mum could be too.-I sighted remembering the fight my mum and I had. 

-What's wrong with your mom?-My dad asked. 

-She disrespects Roger so much. He never called him by his name since we started dating and all because she thinks I should have forgive John for cheating me with Ashley. 

-Erin, I know your mum wants the best for you, but this is your life and you have to live it the way you feel it's going to make you happy.-My dad said.-I don't want to sound cruel, but don't let your mother bring your relationship down. 

-Thank you daddy.-I said with a sad smile. I missed my dad so much.-I love you so much. 

-I love you too my love.-He chuckled.-I have to get going, I'll call you whenever I can.

-Tell Helen I say hi, and that I thank her that she's helping you.

-I will.-Dad assured me.-Bye baby girl. 

-Bye dad.-I smiled shooting my phone down. I was really happy about my dad finding help for his drug problem, and I was so grateful that Helen, his wife, was there for him when I couldn't. I went to my closet, trying to find something good to wear to my date, with happy thoughts and a smile. 

(***) 

Roger texted me telling that he was going to be here soon so, with a lot of courage, I went outside my room finding my mum on the couch. She looked at me. 

-I suppose you're going on a date.-She said returning her eyes to the TV. 

-You suppose well.-I answered.-I won't be sleeping here these next days, and I'll be coming to get my things. 

-The thing about living with _Roger_ was serious?-He made a special enfazise on his name. 

-Yes, we already have an apartment, so I'll just come to get my clothes and things.-I answered her. 

-You'll come back.-She said.-You will always come back here, it's where you belong.

My phone rang so I looked at the screen for a moment to find a message from my boyfriend. 

**Roggie♡:** I'm outside. Should I get inside? 

**Erin:** I'm coming. 

-As I told you I'm not sleeping here, so don't wait for me awake.-I said to my mother before crossing the door. I found my boyfriend outside his car, leaned against it with his arms crossed by his chest and a beautiful smile on his lips. I walked towards him. 

-Bloody hell!-He said when I was in front of him.-I think I've never seen a girl that was more beautiful than you. 

-You're going to make me blush!-I said laughing. I pecked his lips once and he opened the car door for me so I could get inside, then he got inside too.-So, how did rehearsal went?

-Eh... It ended up being fine, I guess.-He answered me.-I promise I didn't beat the shit out of John. 

-I know Rog, I trust you.-I said smiling.-And being honest, if you had beaten John up, Brian would have called me.

-That speaker bastard.-My boyfriend said.-Nobody can have a secret with him. 

-Of course we can, it's just that your secrets are shit.-I said laughing.-He never told you I was pregnant once, and he knew. And he also thought that you should know, but he never told you. 

-That's because he loves you more than he loves me.-He rolled his eyes while I couldn't stop laughing.-Talking about the apartment... Do you want to see it tomorrow, after school? Freddie told me he doesn't mind, if you're free. 

-Yeah, sure.-I answered.-As soon as possible. I don't want to live in that house anymore. 

-Did you tell your mom... 

-Yes. She doesn't believe we can make it, and I can't wait to prove her wrong.-I said smiling at my boyfriends profile.-Also my dad called today. He's starting rehabilitation. 

-Really?-Roger asked taking his eyes off the road in a red light.-Erin,that's amazing! 

-I know right?-I smiled again.-He also asked me about you. He said he's happy about you making me happy. 

-Wow... That's... Great. 

-You're not happy about that? 

-Yes.-He said quickly.-Its just that... I don't know... I think I'm too used to your mother. 

-Things will get better.-I smiled taking his hand.-I know they will. 

-If we are together.-He said kissing me before driving again. 

(***) 

When we arrived at the restaurant they guided us to our table. We have been here for half and hour more or less and it had been amazing. We weren't talking about my mum or John, just about random things that included us both, like travels, more dates, our life living together. 

When Roger was talking about visiting my father in Dublin for Christmas my phone rang. I thought it would be Brian, or even Freddie to ask something about our meeting tomorrow to see his apartment. 

But it was Ashley. 

-What the hell do you want?-I asked when I answered. Roger looked at me curious. I heard a hard breathing at the other line.-Ashley? 

-Erin I need you.-She said quickly. She was hyperventilating and I could bet she was crying. 

-Ashley, what the hell is happening.-I asked again starting to grow worried without couldn't help. 

-It's John.-She said.-He had an attack and... I promise I tried to calm him down but... He hurt himself.

I was silent. The last time John did something like that was much more before my accident. 

-You were always better than me at calming him Erin and... I called and ambulance but... They're not here yet and... I'm scared, Erin, please. 

-Where are you?-I asked. 

-At John's house.-She replied. 

-Okay, try to make him breathe and don't let him lose a lot of blood.-With those words Roger looked at me worried, asking with his eyes what was going on. 

-He already has lost a lot of blood Erin!-She screamed scared. 

-Then don't let him sleep, okay?-I said.-I'll be there as soon as possible. 

And Ashley finished our call. 

-What happened?-Roger asked worried. I looked at him almost crying. 

-John hurt himself.-I answered. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ATTENTION: Mention of self-harm with a (semi) explicit scene at the begging, read down your own decision.
> 
> Also prepare yourself for a cute John x Erin moment :')
> 
> Enjoy the reading <3

Roger and I payed for the food we already had and left a bit more of money for disturbing. 

Roger started to drive to John's house, which wasn't far away from the restaurant we were eating at. I was too nervous about this.

John has always had anxiety. It was something he tried to fight against but sometimes it was just impossible, and he used self-harm as a method to discharge anxiety. He didn't do it currently, I was always there for him to help him breathe and stop crying. The self-harm usually happened when he was alone with Brian or Ashley. They were not as good as me in calming him. This topic was something that always worried me, but we both fought against it and the last time he cut himself was two months before I had my accident.

He was so proud of himself... 

Roger stopped the car in front of John's door, where Ashley was already, keeping it opened. Roger took his phone to text Brian and Freddie as he Follow me inside the house. Ashley told me he was in the bathroom. I ran into the bathroom and almost got shocked by the scene.

John was on the floor, crying, shaking and hyperventilating. There was a blade on the floor and his wrists dripped blood. I reached down to his height and made him look me in the eyes.

-Hey, hey John, it's me.-He closed his eyes.-Look at me. It's me, it's Erin. I'm here with you.

He kept his eyes closed. I swallowed nervous and I thought of that magic word. Our magic word.

-Deaky.-I called.-Deaky, open your eyes, it's me. Erin. 

-E...Erin?-He talked.

-Yes, it's me.-I smiled when he opened his eyes.-Let's take care of you, okay?-He nodded still shaking.-I'm going to help him control his breathing. Roger, if I remember correctly in the closet on the right there should be bandages and ethyl alcohol for medical use. Wet the bandages well and give them to me, he has to stop bleeding.

Roger did as I said and Ashley stayed at the door frame looking at me and John and crying. 

-Okay Deaky, you've done this lots of times, yes? Do you remember how to do it?-I asked and he shocked his head. I took his hand and I put it on my chest breathing in a calming way.-The ambulance is coming, but you have to follow my breathing now Deaky, can you do that? We can do it counting backwards, okay?-He nodded and I smiled. 

Roger put the bandages on both of John's wrists and he settled himself next to Ashley, leaving me with John. 

_Ten. _

-Inhale.-He inhaled trying to follow me without forcing himself, never breaking eyes contact with me.

_Nine. _

-Exhale.-I always kept a smile on my face, trying not to worry him. Anxiety did this, he didn't need to feel more nervous, he needed to think that everything was going to be okay.

_Eight. _

-Inhale.-I hated him once, when I saw he was having sex with Ashley, but he was my first love. I cared about him, and he knew. And he cared about me, and I knew. I did want him to get hurt.

_Seven._

-Erin...-John talked. 

-Shh, don't talk Deaky, just follow my breathing.-I said.-Exhale.

_Six._

-Inhale.-He was finally having this better rhythm.-Thats it Deaky, you're doing fantastic.

_Five._

-Exhale.-I heard the ambulance outside, along with some screams from Brian and Freddie. Ashley ran to open the door.

-Erin...-Roger said.

-Let me.-I said shaking my head.

_Four._

-We're almost there Deaky, inhale.-I smile even brighter drying his tears with my free hand.

_Three. _

-Exhale.-He started to stop shaking. I noticed two doctors next to Roger, Brian and Freddie behind, trying to calm Ashley. 

_Two._

-Go Deaky, those are the last ones, okay?-He nodded.-Inhale.

_One. _

-And exhale.-His breathing was normal, his wrists stopped bleeding, and he wasn't shaking anymore.-You did great, Deaky. 

John pulled me into a hug while the doctors were asking Ashley a few questions before taking John to the hospital. 

-You have to go to the hospital, they have to check on those wrists.-I said into his ear. 

-Please don't go, stay with me.-I looked back at Roger and he smile nodding. 

-I'm not going anywhere, Deaky.

(***) 

Hospitals weren't really my thing.

I had to visit them sometimes while I was with John due to his anxiety and his self-harm episodes.

I had to stay here because of my accident, and I had to come sometimes too while I was pregnant. 

I had to visit my dad twice at the hospital in Dublin due to his drug abuse. 

And now John again. 

Roger, Freddie, Brian, Ashley and I were in the waiting room of the hospital, expectants and nervous about John. I had rand his mother and she said she was coming too. I was sat next to Roger, his hand around my shoulders caressing the high part of my arm conforting me and whispering that I've done a great job and that John was going to be fine.

-Thank you, Erin.-Ashle said.-I didn't tell you yet.-I nodded my head hearing some screamings. I knew that voice for sure. I touched Brian's arm and nodded to the woman that was screaming. He followed me while I was approaching her.

-Lilian.-I called her. She looked at me and ran into my direction. When she arrived she hugged me.

-Oh my God, Erin.-She whispered into my ear. I rubbed her back conforting her.-How is he?

-Nobody says anything.-I answered while John's mum hugged Brian.-I bet his fine. I helped him to control his breathing and his wrists stopped bleeding by the time the ambulance arrived to his home.

-Thank you Erin.-Lilian took my hand and I smiled at her.-After everything he did to you... You're still there for him if he needs you.

I smiled and without taking off her hand, Brian and I walked with her towards the others. She said hello to Ashley and she hugged her for a bit, before turning back to Fred and Rog.

-Guys this is Lilian, John's mother. Lilian, this is Freddie, the singer of the band, and this is Roger, my boyfriend.-I introduced them.

-Also the drummer.-Roger smiled shaking Lilian's hand.

-Nice to meet you Ms. Deacon.-Freddie said with a sympathy smile.-This is not the place or the situation where I wanted to meet you, tho.

-Nice to meet you guys.-Lilian sighted. He rubbed her face with her hands.-I can't believe he did this again... He was fine, Erin... My poor baby...

-I know Lilian, but he's strong.-I caressed her arms looking at her with hope.-He's going to get off of this, like he always did.

-Family and friends of mister Deacon.-We all turned back at the voice of one of the doctors that where inside the ambulance.-He's stable. We took care of his wounds and he's in observation due to his hyperventilating, but for the other things he's fine.

-Thanks God.-Lilian said looking up.-And thank you doctor.

-He's also asking for Erin Smith to come in.-Everyone looked at me. I nodded towards the doctor and kissed Roger with a smile.

-I'll tell him you are all here.-I smiled at everyone and follow the doctor. He stopped at a room where I could see John lying on the bed. I smiled when I saw he was healthier than earlier. I stepped inside and sat down at the edge of the bed. John looked at me and smiled taking on eof my hands.-Hey Deaky.

-Hey.-He said smiling, but he's face turned into a frown in about seconds.-I'm sorry about... _This._

-Deaky...-I said with surprise.-We both know it's impossible for you to control your anxiety. You don't have to apologize for that.

-I'm not apologizing for that.-He said.-I'm apologizing because Ashley ruined your date with Roger. I'm sure he hates me even more now...

-Well, that's not true, because Roger has been in the waiting room asking the nurses about you since we got here.-I smiled and John looked at me confused.-You're in his band, you're going to spend a lot of time together, you maybe end up being best friends. He cares about you. And even if he didn't, he wouldn't like you to get hurt like this.

John smiled every time I called him Deaky or when I was talking about how Roger cared about him. I knew that deep inside my boyfriend he liked John. 

John wasn't a bad person. He made a mistake, a big one. But he was quiet, gentle, noble, lovely, funny... He was a sunshine for everyone.

-Do you have any idea where the attack came from?-I asked him.

-I messed up at rehearsal, six time in the same fucking part.-John admitted.-We have our first official show next week and I can't fucking play the opening song.

-Okay, first of all, fucking isn't the word that a gentleman has to say.-I said making him laugh.-And second... You are the best bass player I've ever known in my life, Deaky. You made mistakes while a rehearsal, that's totally normal. And you will sort it out before that show. And you'll nail it.

-You think so?-He asked. I smiled at him.

-I know so.-I squeeze his hand. We gave each other a warm smile.-Everyone's here, even your mum. You want them to come in?-John nodded with a smile.

-Just the guys.-He said.-The guys and you now. I'll talk with my mum and Ashley later, better alone.-I nodded and went outside the room to take the others to see John. I told Ashley and Lilian that John wanted to see them alone a bit later and guided Brian, Freddie and Roger to John's room, Roger taking my hand.

-Hey darling.-Fred spoke stepping into John's room. John smiled greeting them.

-How are you feeling, John?-Roger asked him.

-I'm better, thanks to my savior here.-He nodded towards me and Roger kissed my cheek with a smile.

-You scared us, mate.-Brian said.-When Roger called me the first thing I thought was "please, don't be dead".

-Always so gentle Bri...-I said warning him thise weren't the words John needed to hear right now.-Youre staying in observation tonight?

-Yes, they want to control my breathing here for tonight, but the doctor said I'll probably be out tomorrow.-He explained.-Although no school for a week.

-Ashley will ask someone from your classes to give you the notes.-Brian said.-We were talking about that before Erin came, actually.

-She couldn't help me...-John said.-She's probably feeling useless and like shit.

-Talk to her.-Freddie said.-She seems to love you a lot, and you love her too. I'm sure she will understand.

-Thank you guys.-John said.-From the bottom of my heart.

-Oh come on John, don't get too soft on us.-Roger said laughing.

-Deaky.-John said.-We're friends. Call me Deaky. 


End file.
